On love- as I know it !

I am fighting a battle. The weird thing is I am not fighting anymore. But the battle is still on.
And I am not able to get out. I don’t have any idea which side is winning or which side is losing.

I am in love with this battle. The battle itself is love. All that remains is love.

Love never dies. Love ends; but never dies. The love that has been shared is never reversed. It remains as it is as long as eternity lasts. Love is eternal.

I have loved- loved with all my heart. And still I do. But the great question answered by silence is –am I in love. Being in love is a state-which can change. I have just an answering silence.

But my love for you is always there. With you, all I know is to love. All I am capable of is love.
We have lost a lot of things- hopes, passion, understanding, happiness.. but love still remains. All this has begun and all this will end in love.

Love is just not an end in itself. It is a journey that we chose to take.

We don’t know where the journey ends or the bend in our road.

We know the pain of separation for we have separated and come together again. That separation was not the end of our lives albeit being undesirable for me.

But now we know, separation cannot kill us or the love that we shared.

I am perfectly confident on you - you don’t need me the way I used to imagine when I was a perfectly naïve female.

And I don’t need you in my life any more as I used to imagine. I don’t need any body for that matter. But if I need any body at all at any point o f time, I’d rather be it you.

Well, is that what is love? Or is it just an open declaration of my comfort with you? Or can that be the acknowledgment of my fear for the unknown?

Unsure about many things, but I can assure of this- years and years hence, I will be saying this with a sigh and a wandering eye that I have loved- a love that is lasting. That remains as long as eternity lasts.

And I am happy for the moments of togetherness, moments of separation, for hopes and the lost hopes, for the flush of excitement and flood of disappointment, for the lightheartedness and the heavy heartedness that this love has given me.

For the reason that without this love for you, I would never have known what loving like this meant.

The Modern Surrender of Woman

In this post, when I write “I”, I mean the group of woman out there somewhere in this world, who agree with whatever I have written. I agree that it could be a minority probably, but it will be the popular minority.

I understand that men and women are different. Men tend to be physically bigger and stronger. They can lift heavy things, push open lodged doors and bottles, not be tired after long journeys, and… and.. that’s it??!!! Well, it seems pretty much it! Oh yes, all the things like this. I used to argue that to balance the see saw , woman are emotionally stronger, can think straight, logically and sensitively in crisis, can show much compassion when it is called for, so on and so forth. There used to be and still are, much debates and disagreements from the side of men against this capabilities of woman. Or rather, these capabilities of woman were ignored in light of the irrelevance of such capabilities in this world. All that mattered is- men are stronger. In the context of the modern surrender of woman, yes I agree to the men folks. All these centuries of arguments, I was wrong. At the wake of the 21st century, I finally see your argument and realize the irrelevance of the capabilities of woman in the ‘emotionally strong’ context. In this age of outsourcing, you can get someone else to do all those things for you. You can depend on a psychologist or a counselor for your emotional pressures and call EMRI\911 for an emergency and get the help of disaster management teams in crisis.
I agree with you (men) when you say that woman tend to gossip about other women mostly because they are jealous. Though men don’t generally gossip about other men; they just bitch about women, it cannot be attributed to jealousy at all. Because why would a man be jealous of a woman!! It sounds so logically incorrect and inconsistent! And a man never loses sleep on the promotion his colleague received or on the new car of the neighbor. The bitching that men tend to do about women are just affirmative statements where they have seen the women crossing limits-either morality or general codes of conduct. Discussing politics or social issues is the way men show concern about what happens around them, men have real good suggestions on how things should be run in the world. These are not time wasting gimmicks but while having such serious matters in head, you really cannot afford to learn about micro level issues like how to run a kitchen. On the other hand, I absolutely agree with you when you say about a woman who would have given an input to your world changing discussions that she is talking in her ignorance and should rather concentrate in running the kitchen rather than the government. After all, how can a woman talk about something other than her cosmetics!!
It is also true that women bosses are so ignorant, stupid and unrealistic. And this is not a stereotyping statement at all. The word stereotyping itself could be a woman invented word as that does not convey anything meaningful. And from what is written, it is evident, there are no bad bosses among men. I know all the men love their men bosses and since men don’t ‘gossip’, in the history of human race, not a bad word has been spoken about any of the men bosses, if it has been spoken, it is the imagination of the women lot.
And, as I said after all these centauries of disagreeing with these kind of things that men keeps telling me, finally now I have decided to unconditionally agree with you on all of the above and more not because men ‘just doesn’t get the point’ and no point in arguing with men, but because I agree with these concepts!

On Wines-especially Sula & Product Plugging-specifically in Almost Single!!

Prologue :

This prologue is written after the below post was published. When I was writing this post, my impression was the favorable mention of Sula in the book ‘Almost Single’ by Advaita Kala was a carefully planned product placement. But later on, I realized (from the comment posted by the big man himself) that it was not an instance of product placement, but a product plug. Advaita Kala must really be in love Sula. So, friends, I stand corrected though I don’t want to make changes to the original post I had written. I am changing the original title from On Wines-especially Sula& Product Placement-specifically in Almost Single to On Wines-especially Sula & Product Plugging-specifically in Almost Single!!

Now you may read on the real stuff.…

My first memories of wine being mentioned was in the holy masses-Jesus took wine, blessed it and gave it to his disciples; and asked them to repeat it whenever they gather to remember him. And so- we did! In all holy masses the ceremony was repeated with ardent faith. But in our churches, they just spoke the words-the priest would never distribute real wine to the people. All that they would do, that too, a few times a year on important dates is to dip the Holy Communion in wine. And that was on very very rare occasions. Even before accepting my first holy communion, I got a taste of wine on one of the Monty Thursdays when dad brought wine for the occasion. That was just a port wine.
Then there was the different type of wines that my neighbor used to make at home-pineapple, beetroot, amla and many other different flavors. On visiting them, I used to get occasional chances of tasting those, but I was still not a wine lover. My love for wine started only when my dad made wine at my home for the first time. We saved a couple of bottles for a few years and then I realized that the concept of ‘old wine’ indeed is a noble one. That is when the stuff becomes really real! Thus homemade wines- ginger, amla and especially grapes remained my favorites for a long time. Otherwise, except for a wine tasting evening- I was not exposed much to the world of wines.
I used to read about the exquisite world of French Wine in Mills and Boons, Sydney Sheldon and the like. And used to wonder how it was like. But it seemed so smooth and sophisticated in the books than in reality. It was then, that I came to read Almost Single by Advaita Kala. Suggested by my friends who read and loved the book, it was a great contemporary novel by an Indian author. Awesome book!! And I got exposed to the world of Sula through it. Though it was read by many of my friends before me, somehow, they all missed the compliments the main character of the book had paid for the Indian wine brand-Sula. As luck would have it, that was the top of the mind recollection for me after reading the book. And I decided to try this one. A little prompting from my side- my friends were also eager to try this new stuff. Promptly, Sula arrived at my house. The young brand from Nasik won my heart that night. Henceforth, as far as I am concerned, the wine nights are definitely going to be Sula nights.
Though that is all about the wines and Sula, being a Marketing majored MBA(though working on a lousy job which has got nothing to do with marketing and hence forgetting all the marketing fundas at a fast phase), I cannot help but comment on the Product Placement/Product Integration done in the book Almost Single. The mentioning of Sula brand as the character’s favorite in the book, is nothing but a clear instance of Product Placement. I was familiar with product placements in movies and television and thought of it in books as a very rare and newly evolving form of marketing. But on research I realized, product placement in books can be dated back to the 19th century. When popular author Jules Verne wrote the classic Around the World in 80 Days, many transport and shipping companies were lobbying to get mentioned in the book. Later, many books have followed suit particularly by placing goods targeted at teenage girls.
In any case, this was the first time; I came across such an effective product placement as far as I was concerned. I tried and loved Sula!!

PS: This post is a classic example of product plugging (instances of product placement without an economic transaction). Here, I have placed both Almost Single and Sula. All the marketers out there! Pay me! I am willing to place your products in my upcoming posts!!!

Home Coming

Though it was after a lot of months -that flew away just like a few-that I retreaded the all too familiar path leading home, I saw nothing has changed. Well, a lot has changed actually-mindsets, relationships, times.. Even the topography. I walked down the familiar path in midst of chaos- through a debris of shattered hopes and dreams that were leading into a void. May be that is the reason why it took me so long to walk this path once again. But finally I had to and so I did!
The rubber trees in the estate along the road are getting replanted. Instead of the huge shade providing trees, I could see a lot more tiny saplings. The jackfruit tree at the river bank is also gone-with nothing to replace. But now, there is a clear vision-of the other bank and also a long way up of where the river is coming from. Now I can clearly see the wooden bridge a little upstream. Or is it a new one? Could be! But I can see that right now it is not functional. Though it looks straight and sturdy from the river bank, it is slightly faltering. One of the supporting pillars is gone with the flood. The only purpose of the new bridge now is to give an old world charm to the whole scene. Ironical!
The week passed very quickly.One of the days, it rained. Don’t know if a rain in the beginning of November is a surprise or a routine. Don’t remember any more. The rain continued for more than 2 hours. And it looked just like routine with little rise in the river water.
In the middle of the week, the phone rang way past mid night. In an instant, I knew it was the death bell. Another of those familiar and most beloved faces vanishes from the face of the earth, yet will be remembered with fond memories.
Soon, it is time for the return journey. I know the feeling of regret of leaving home is mutual. After all, it is here that I was loved and I learned to love. This is where I dragged myself on my belly, I tottered and fell, and I rose and learned to walk. It was here that I started to dream, to believe; to judge- this is where I grew up. This is where I started on every journey that I embarked on. This is where I returned after every such journey. The hostels were great, Sai Teja is delightful; but this place is Home.

It doesn't matter which road you take!

You are walking a barren road
It is a long winding dusty road

It is hard to move forward
But you do or you fall dead

would I choose if I were you?
To move ahead or drop dead here
Tough question to answer friend
Some questions can be answered
Only by living the questions
And that I would do If I were you.

The dust would turn to muddy water
If only it rain a few drops in the night
But that too is an ominous state
Knee deep in mud is not my
idea of the ideal road for me to walk

And no change can you expect in this
dusty windy road but a grubby rain!!!
And you have to keep going
I just know so much

Some where ahead, just a little ahead
the road will diverge!!
(ha!! reminded of the mighty poem?)
but yes, this happens in life too
And which one will you take
Or will you be forced to one?

Remeber you are always a solitary walker
You take the road less travelled
or the road more travelled
You are walking the road only once
Both roads will have the bends, the curves and the gutters
You don't know what lies ahead

May be! Just may be, who knows!
the roads will converge again
At the other side of the bend!

It doesn't matter which road you take
When you really don't know
Where you want to go!

On Communism, Social Welfare and the People of my state

ഭാരതം എന്ന് കേട്ടാല്‍ അഭിമാന പൂരിതമാവണം അന്തരന്ഗം!!!!
കേരളം എന്ന് കേട്ടാലോ തിളക്കണം ചോര നമ്മുക്ക് ഞരമ്പുകളില്‍!!!!!

This post is due. Rather than writing about my nostalgias or weird fantasies, finally I am penning down something which I owe and quite a few others who make misinformed cynical comments deserve.
This is about that little state down south called Kerala which is often being talked about as a beautiful place sadly ruined by power of communism and a group of bad attitude people. Well, for a change, let me tell you something. Communism is not a bad word. It is a philosophy just like Capitalism or Libertarianism. Like all other philosophy, this too has its good and bad sides. Any philosophy at its extreme might prove detrimental to the freedom and welfare of the stakeholders. Just like extreme Capitalism will lead to higher disparity between the rich and the poor, extreme communism may lead to human right violations. But adopting such a great philosophy as a way of living by a large part of the community or having a political party following this philosophy run the government does not make Kerala a loser state!
Kerala is the first state in the world with a democratically elected Communist government. That happened in 1956 when the state in its present form was just born. Thereafter, this communist government has been voted in to power (and many times voted out too!!) by the people of the state, and not by military coupe or rebellion as you might fantasize. Rather than being an extreme institute of power and dictatorship, the Communist government has been focusing on rightful distribution of living conditions! I am not giving the credit only to the communist government. I am sure that each government that ruled the state has had its role to play in bringing Kerala to be the state with highest Standard of living index score. We have one of the highest literacy rates, lower infant mortality rate and low growth rates. And we have a higher woman to man ratio which is in par with the most developed countries in the world. True that we don’t have the kind of yearly GDP on par with other states. But at the same time, we also don’t have large number of beggars peeping into the car window at every signal like what happens in the big metropolitan cities. In spite of low domestic product and under developed Industrial sector, we don’t have a large BPL population. Recently I came across something called a Physical Quality of Life Index where our little state of Kerala stands only next to Japan even in the late 80’s in the whole of Asia.
We have learned in our basic economic classes:
Economic development = Economic Growth+ Social Welfare
Those states with the huge metros of the country (I live in one of them) might have a drastically higher growth in GDP, Consumption and Infrastructure. They could brag of the achievements they have made in IT, Industry, Agriculture- of their contribution to the national wealth. While not intending to suggest any of them are small achievements, I still wonder if any of them can demand their place at the top in case of social welfare. Yesterday, a misinformed friend of mine was suggesting that this achievement in terms of welfare of masses was achieved because of the low population. I have news for you my dear friend; we are talking about a state with a population density of 800 plus per square km, which stands 3rd in the most densely populated states in the country.
We might not have great industrial production to boast about; we do not have sufficient land and the unskilled laborers for these industries will have to come from the neighboring states (we have a population of highly educate people who would simply be over qualified for those work). But at the same time, we are already a dream destination for tourists. We are also slowly placing our foot in the IT and ITES sector with scores of technology parks coming up and investor friendly policies of the government (u heard it right!! The Investor friendly attitude of the left government!!!)
And what is so wrong with the people and their attitude? There are quite a lot of people who mock the large population of expatriates of the state. When opportunities were less in the country we had a large chunk of qualified people who exploited such opportunities available elsewhere. They are responsible for the steady flow of foreign income to the country. They form a major part of the NRI community which have played a major role in creating and building the economy. Moreover, they were the first brand ambassadors for the nation who propagated indirectly to the outside world that here is a country with a huge population of quality and skill whom you could rely on. And this belief is the basis of all outsourcing that has come to the country so far.
Those who criticize the strikes and demonstrations in Kerala against the government and authorities also should realize that this is part of a culture that has formed from questioning the unjust. We are a group of people who will raise our voices against injustice. Like many others in the other part of the country, we do not consider justice, welfare and social development as a gift; we believe that it is our right. Unlike the money making machineries that walk the earth in other parts of the country, we are aware of and concerned about the happenings around us, it is our nature to form opinion, respond and protest when things go wrong. Still, as per the latest India today survey, we stand first in maintain law and order in the country. This is achieved in a diverse population where one half is Hindu; Christian and Muslim a quarter each; which is a recipe for chronic communal warfare in the rest of India.
It is true that malayalies have a sense of humor that is self deprecating. We make criticizing yet funny jokes on ourselves. And their criticizing culture makes them discuss loudly about what we have not achieved rather than what we have. But that in no way should give others misinformed ideas that we are losers!!!!